Monday, April 11, 2011

No Baby Zone

via Google Image Search for NO BABIES

It's like a no fly zone, but for babies. No babies here. Furry babies? Yes, please. No human babies, though. Not for the time being at least.

Unlike some newlyweds, we're not getting pressure to have babies from family or friends. I've heard of people being asked on the day of their wedding when they planned to have babies. Because clearly the only reason people get married is to have babies... sike. Maybe it's that I've made it very clear to everyone I know that this is a no baby zone. Either way, I'm glad that pressure doesn't exist for us.

We are, however, getting pressure from marketing companies. Oh hi Target and Bed Bath. We used to have a registry with you, but now that our wedding date has passed you want to send us baby item emails. Awesome. That's really helpful and not annoying or freaking me out at all.

I used to be signed up for The Knot. You have to put your wedding date in when you sign up so they can give you a countdown on the top of the page every time you go to their website. Not gonna lie, I wanted to see wedding pics on there way before I even got engaged, so I signed up and made up a date. Then when we got engaged and picked a date, I changed it. WELL apparently they think I don't want to see wedding pics anymore, because they've now automatically changed over my subscription to their sister site, The Nest. For the longest time I thought was a parenting website because I would immediately delete their emails, and when I hear "nest" I think "empty nest" which = no children, so nest = children in my mind. Turns out it's actually a home and life kinda thing. So, ok, it's not The Bump which is ANOTHER of their sister sites, but yet I still get emails from The Nest saying things like "See what your future children will look like!" and "Decorate your baby's room with these tips!". No. I don't want to hear your tips or see what creepy photos of children you come up with. I didn't ask to be signed up for The Nest. I don't like that The Nest automatically assumes that I'm having children, let alone anytime soon. The Knot might want to poll its readers and find out if they want to receive The Nest, or, hey, some of us still like looking at wedding pics, so I'd like to continue to get The Knot! I totally still get Martha Stewart Weddings emails. Martha would never make an assumption like that. So now I need to go log into The Knot and make up a new wedding date so I can stop getting stupid emails I don't want. Oh, wait, what's that? When I type in it automatically redirects me to Arrgg.

Dear The Knot,

I love your pretty pictures, but I really hate you and your assumptions. You know what happens when you assume things, right? Yeah, you make an ass out of you. No, not me, just you.


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