Monday, May 23, 2011

Dear Hair...

Dear Hair - I hate you. Not even the style I have at the moment, just YOU. When it rains - POOF. When it's just a tad bit humid - POOF. When it's winter - STATIC.

My hair is the worst. People think it's straight. It's not. It's also not curly. So I suppose it's wavy since it's somewhere inbetween, but it's not like a cool I-could-ever-pull-off-a-beachy-wavy-hairdo kind of thing. I straighten my hair every GD morning. The second I step outside, if it's rainy, humid (which is, like, April - October in Philly, believe it or not), too cold, too hot (because then I get sweaty and my hair doesn't do any form of moisture), or windy… so, basically every day of my life… my hair is just done. I think it's evil. It plays coy like, "Oh yeah, you straightened me so good today! I'm going to look good for you for once!" Then as soon as I step outside it laughs in my face and calls me a sucka. Or something like that.

I've even started using products in my hair - which I didn't do for many many years. NOTHING WORKS.

So after failure after failure, every few days I just give up and pin my hair back in a not-so-cute whatever you want to call it. It's not a ponytail because I don't have enough hair for such a thing. It's not a bun for the same reason. I guess it's a nub, with short side hairs falling all over the place. I look so cool.

My beauty girl (formerly waxer, currently just does my facials) told me I should try a Keratin treatment or Brazilian blow out. I thought those were just for people with curly hair, but what do I know? Apparently nothing "Keratin treatments smooth coarse and curly hair that resists styling or hair that tends to react to humidity or heat." OMG that's me. Well, the next time a Living Social deal pops up for one of these treatments, I may just take them up on it. Although there is mucho controversy surrounding these things, because some of the treatments use formaldehyde, a chemical linked to causing cancer, and can cause nose bleeds and other fun stuff. Hmmm… I think I need to ask my hair stylist next time I go in. Or just shave my head. OR carry a flat iron around with me at all times. I totally brought mine with me to work the other day because we were having a big event and I didn't want to look… like I normally do. And it was raining.

^ Me, like every day of my life.
via Google Image Search

Who wants to pitch in and buy me a stylist for life?

Seriously, why can't I just wear a wig? Just throw it on in the morning and be done with it. I really want to. And it would save me from making sooo many frivolous attempts at having a decent hair day.



1 comment:

  1. Be careful with brazilian blow outs, they use a certain chemical which can be harmful to your hair. I actually started using this Tresemme shampoo and conditioner which is for "weather related troubles" against wind, humiditity and something else. I noticed that when you leave the conditioner on for the full 3 really does help after you straighten it, not as frizzy. It says if you use the frizz serum with it it'll be better, but I don't.